Rescuing wayward children is a balancing act, the efforts of juggling Justice and Mercy. In the following correspondence, a father wrestles with dealing with offense, yearning for more priesthood support, and trying to maintain control while showing love-no easy tasks, and common struggles of faithful parents.

Dear Larry,

My family lives in Utah. My wife and I have been married for 25 years. We both served missions, and we try to live faithfully serve in the Church and live the gospel. Our two oldest boys were Eagle Scouts, Seminary graduates, presidents of their quorums, fine examples to other youth, and they both served missions. However, neither one served in leadership positions, and that nagged at them.

When they returned home and joined a singles’ ward, they didn’t feel needed or valued. Now, these boys have been taught that you don’t wait for opportunity to serve. You go get it! You go meet the Elders President and Bishop and let them know you’d like to be put to work. Sadly, nothing happened, and now, three years later, they are inactive. They break commandments that they never would have considered breaking before. I am continually distressed that they put them in compromising situations.

I have met with their priesthood leaders many times. These men recognize the problem, but they want my sons to meet them halfway. I suggested that you don’t meet the “lost sheep” halfway, you go find them and bring them back. Both boys are waiting to feel valued as returned missionaries, that their having served is appreciated. They are waiting for someone to care that they are lost.

Of course, I understand that they are suffering from distorted thinking and ever-weakening testimonies, but their concerns don’t go away. How can totally active returned missionaries go into total inactivity? When I have heard of such stories, I have always thought that I could identify some glaring flaw in someone’s past. But in this case, my boys simply slipped away. Any help?

Confused and Searching Father

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