Ask Gramps.org
Should I confront those who make disparaging remarks about our adopted black son?
Dear Gramps,
One of my sons is black. My husband and I overheard a couple last week during Sacrament meeting saying how they would never adopt a black baby because they don’t have values, and they are like “animals”, etc. I want to confront them, but I’m pretty sure I will lose control of myself. How can I get over it? Should I confront them?
Jackie, from Lehi, Utah
Dear Jackie,
I have a couple of black grandkids myself. I think that it would be useless to confront anyone on such a prejudicial issue. Because theirs is an opinion of prejudice, your confronting them will never change their minds, but will only reinforce what they believe in. Such irrational postures in my opinion are best treated by letting the them starve to death from inattention. It would be well to treat such prejudiced people as kindly as if nothing had happened. When they see in you a happy family, and see the achievements of your black son, they may begin to change their minds.
Gramps
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